Sunday, July 30, 2006
Pervasive "blah"
My emotions are not my own right now. At least "not mine" in the sense that they're local to me. For years I have admitted that I'm a sponge of affects. It only takes about 20 minutes to soak up the energies of the people around me.
Phil is back in town from Philadelphia, and it's great to have him back, though admittedly I still feel a little lonely even knowing he's here. Totally not his fault though.
Last night went to go see "A Scanner Darkly" with Phil. It was definitely an interesting movie, but I'm not sure if I really liked it. I'll list as worthwhile nonetheless, if anything just to see what a movie made through the process of "interpolated rotoscoping" looks like. Doesn't hit nearly as hard as Requiem for a Dream, but still sends the "drugs are NOT good" message.
Today I decided to get my hair cut. Completely uneventful except for this cute little girl that happened to be there at the same time. She was with her mom and was probably somewhere between 2-3 years old. It was her first haircut and she threw a fit, but it was really cute too. Her mom bought her a little magic-wand-like toy before coming into the shop and sat consoling her with it. I sat smiling paralyzed by the forces of adorable at work around me.
The afternoon involved a day trip down to Desert Ridge since I hadn't been in a long time. Made the usual rounds talking to the people I know out there and stopping in the stores I like. It was an oddly comforting afternoon. Made a stop by Barnes & Noble and bought a new paper journal and spent some time writing.
Also, picked up a copy of "My Undoing: Love in the thick of sex, drugs, pornography, and prostitution," by gay porn super star Aiden Shaw. I started reading it lightly in the store, and it turned out to actually be fairly engrossing. Super light read, but some of the views and emotions expressed by the author hit really close to home. I find it remarkable and simultaneously crazy that my emotions are not all that different from a 40 something year old veteran porn star.
Between the depressing movie, afternoon of cathartic writing, reading a book that reminds me of my emotions, a boyfriend healing, and sitting here writing this when I thought I'd be picking said boyfriend up at the airport from his return..... I am left with a fairly all-encompassing sense of "blah." I'm going to go to work tomorrow and hopefully clear my mind.
Phil is back in town from Philadelphia, and it's great to have him back, though admittedly I still feel a little lonely even knowing he's here. Totally not his fault though.
Last night went to go see "A Scanner Darkly" with Phil. It was definitely an interesting movie, but I'm not sure if I really liked it. I'll list as worthwhile nonetheless, if anything just to see what a movie made through the process of "interpolated rotoscoping" looks like. Doesn't hit nearly as hard as Requiem for a Dream, but still sends the "drugs are NOT good" message.
Today I decided to get my hair cut. Completely uneventful except for this cute little girl that happened to be there at the same time. She was with her mom and was probably somewhere between 2-3 years old. It was her first haircut and she threw a fit, but it was really cute too. Her mom bought her a little magic-wand-like toy before coming into the shop and sat consoling her with it. I sat smiling paralyzed by the forces of adorable at work around me.
The afternoon involved a day trip down to Desert Ridge since I hadn't been in a long time. Made the usual rounds talking to the people I know out there and stopping in the stores I like. It was an oddly comforting afternoon. Made a stop by Barnes & Noble and bought a new paper journal and spent some time writing.
Also, picked up a copy of "My Undoing: Love in the thick of sex, drugs, pornography, and prostitution," by gay porn super star Aiden Shaw. I started reading it lightly in the store, and it turned out to actually be fairly engrossing. Super light read, but some of the views and emotions expressed by the author hit really close to home. I find it remarkable and simultaneously crazy that my emotions are not all that different from a 40 something year old veteran porn star.
Between the depressing movie, afternoon of cathartic writing, reading a book that reminds me of my emotions, a boyfriend healing, and sitting here writing this when I thought I'd be picking said boyfriend up at the airport from his return..... I am left with a fairly all-encompassing sense of "blah." I'm going to go to work tomorrow and hopefully clear my mind.
# posted by Chris/Stewy @ Sunday, July 30, 2006 
